Pegs to Hang Anger On
"An angry man stirs up strife, and a hot-tempered man abounds in transgression."1
Unresolved anger can express itself in a score of destructive ways including resentment, a negative critical attitude, hostility and hatred. It causes all sorts of problems both to the angry person and to those on whom he dumps his anger.
Repressed it can become super-charged and cause the angry person to explode and lash out and hurt people—even murder them. Or it can cause a person to implode and ruin his physical health and destroy his relationships.
Unresolved anger is like an emotional cancer and you either get rid of the "cancer" or in time the "cancer" will get rid of you—one way or another.
Furthermore, angry people are forever looking for pegs to hang their anger on. Instead of facing their own reality, they are forever looking for faults—real or imagined—in others on whom to dump their anger and blame them for it.
So how do you relate to these people? Wherever possible it's best to avoid them. If you can't avoid them, exercise tough love and let them know in a kind way that there will be consequences (such as distancing yourself from them) if they continue to treat you in an angry, abusive way, either physically or emotionally.
If you happen to be an angry person, the first thing to do is admit it and then seek the help of a qualified anger-management counselor to help you work through and resolve your anger. Doing this will be one of the most loving things you can do for your loved ones and for yourself.
Suggested prayer: "Dear God, if I am an angry person, please help me to see and admit this, and to find the help I need to resolve it so I can always maintain a loving attitude. And please give me the courage to lovingly confront any angry person in my life by letting them know that I will no longer allow them to treat me in an angry, abusive way, and that I will have to distance myself from them if they refuse to get the help they need to overcome their anger issue. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."
Note: See the article, "Taming Your Anger" at http://tinyurl.com/b439f.
1. Proverbs 29:22 (NASB).