ACTS International
Home Page of ACTS International
Home Page of ACTS InternationalHow to Find and Know God without having to be religiousLife Help Articles dealing with faith, family, and practical helps for purposeful livingDaily and Weekend Encounters with more than a third-of-a-million worldwide subscribersSupport the Work of ACTS International a not-for-profit organization. Donations are tax deductible for U.S. donorsCurrent report on the ministries and services of ACTS InternationalOnline Store of ACTS ... ACTS CommunicationsAbout ACTS International
ACTS International Home Page Click here for the current issue of  Daily Encounter
         
     
   
Tell a Friend Site Map Share and/or Bookmark
   
         
   
Articles > Marriage and Family: > Why Does God Have Me in This Relationship?

Why Does God Have Me in This Relationship?

"You do not have because you do not ask [God]. You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures."1

A Daily Encounter subscriber writes, "I have fallen out of love with a man over a year now, so is it possible for me to fall back in love with him? We are not married. We have had a roller-coaster ride in this relationship over many years, so why is God allowing us to stay in this relationship. Also we are back together after 16 years. If we are meant to be together as husband and wife, why doesn't God show me?

"Dear Henrietta" (name changed), I replied, "First of all realize that—at least in our Western culture—'falling in love' has more to do with being strongly attracted to someone, being fascinated with this person, or more often than not being physically and/or sexually attracted to this person. It may lead to true love but it isn't love. It's either fascination or just plain lust. True love is a commitment of one imperfect person to another imperfect person, with or without so called 'in love' overpowering feelings.

"Secondly, God isn't co-dependent. God will give us wisdom and guidance if we genuinely want it, but he doesn't make our decisions or choices for us. If he did, he would be keeping us immature and over-dependent. The reality is that you are still in this not-going-anywhere relationship because you, and not God, have chosen to be in it.

"Also, realize, that only happy and mature people find and relate to happy and mature partners, and vice versa, and have happy and fulfilling relationships. Furthermore, it's not so much a case of praying for the right partner but rather praying that you become the right partner, for only as you become the right person/partner will you be attracted to the right partner, and he to you. In life we all are either as sick or as healthy as the partners we are attracted to and they to us. Thus, if you are choosing to stay in a bad relationship, it indicates that you have issues you need to resolve. This is what God wants you to see. His concern for you is that you become a healthy and mature person before becoming involved in a committed relationship that could lead to marriage.

"To pray the right prayer you need to ask God to show you the truth about you and why you are in such an unhealthy relationship, and to help you find the help you need to recover and become whole. For only to the degree that we are made whole will our lifestyle, our attitudes, our behavior, and our relationships be wholesome. Only as we face the truth about our self, resolve our issues, and become whole will any of us have a chance of finding a meaningful and genuinely loving relationship.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, please help me always to pray the right prayer—with the right motives—so that I will have the assurance that you have heard my prayer and that you will answer it according to your will. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus' name, amen."

1. James 4:2-3 (NIV).

Note: for further help, see the following website for articles on relationships at: http://www.actsweb.org/articles/Marriage.php.

<:))))><


All articles on this website are written by
Richard (Dick) Innes unless otherwise stated.



   
    Back to Return to previous page Previous Page    
         
       
   
Site Map   Top
   
     
         
Find Peace With God footer
 
  ARTICLES
About God
About Faith
Relationships
Success/Failure
Solutions
Recovery
Ask the Teacher
Better Living Tips
Friendship
Words of Love
Words of Inspiration
People Power for Jesus
Simple and Effective Witnessing for Christ

SITE TRANSLATIONS
Spanish Espanol
French Francois

  DEVOTIONS
Devotionals
Daily Encounter
Weekend Encounter
Encuentros Diarios
Archives
Subscribe
When God Is Silent
Prayer Partners
  Needed

Special Needs

BIBLE HELPS
Helps and Studies
Today's Reading
Annual Reading

  QUOTES AND TESTS
Today's Quotes
Happiness Test
Stress Test

ACTS IN ACTION

ACTS Websites
ACTS in Action Report

COMMUNICATIONS

Syndicate ACTS Articles
"I Hate Witnessing"
   Audio—No Charge

Opening Closed Minds
Effective Communications
Jesus, the Communicator
Punching Holes in
   the Darkness

  REPORTS
About ACTS
Be an ACTS Friend

MISC.
People Power Invite
Links
Weather
Privacy Policy
Snail-Mail List
Contact Us/Feedback

ACTS BOOKSTORE
Online Bookstore


Site Map
Report problems to ACTS International
All pages in this site © Copyright 2005-2017 by ACTS International
P.O. Box 73545, San Clemente, CA 92673 U.S.A.
 
HOME   Daily Encounter  Find Peace With God