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ot so many years ago, Maurice Wright, a British farmer, bought a large painting from a neighboring farmer for less than four dollars and hung it in his barn.

After collecting cobwebs for several years, the painting was noticed by the farmer’s tax accountant. He wondered what it might be worth, took a color photograph of it and sent the photo to Christies, the well-known London auction firm. Subsequently, he learned that the painting might be the work of Thomas Daniell, a highly acclaimed nineteenth century artist.

The painting turned out to be an 1808 Daniell. Art critics had been aware of its existence, but it had come to be known as the \"Lost Daniell,\" its whereabouts having been a mystery for over a century.

Wright sold the painting at an auction—for more than $90,000!

Imagine finding something like that in your barn! Think of the Christmas gifts you’d be able to buy this year.

But what if the enterprising tax accountant hadn’t noticed the painting in the farmer’s barn and considered its possible worth? It probably would still be hanging there.

At Christmas time especially, many of us are plagued with the problem of trying to buy gifts for our families and friends. What will we get and for whom? Where will the money come from? And why do we buy gifts anyhow?

Sad to say, like Farmer Wright, every one of us has untold riches to share with others, but unlike him, we usually fail to discover them. We get so caught up in the commercialization of Christmas we often overlook the most valuable gift of all—a gift we all have to give but often are unaware of— the gift of ourselves.

Some parents give endless
things but never give themselves.

Let\'s be honest. Much of our giving is done because it’s a Christmas tradition. We don’t ask why we do it, we just do it. Sometimes we give only because someone else bought a gift for us and we feel obligated to buy a gift in return. Even worse, some of our giving has strings attached and becomes a subtle way of controlling, or seeks to \"buy\" another person’s love.

But love cannot be bought and it is extremely sad when people consciously or unconsciously try to do this. It is equally sad when people feign love in order to get gifts.

Sadly, too, some parents buy endless things for their children as a substitute for love or as a means to control their children. They over-buy at Christmas, at birthdays, and throughout the year. They give endless things but fail to give the greatest gift of all, without which all gifts are empty—the gift of themselves.

Children who grow up in this type of environment feel smothered. They tend to withdraw from their parents, who, using false guilt to add further control, complain, \"After all I’ve done for you, you treat me like this!\"

Michelle grew up in such a home. Her parents gave her everything she ever needed, and many things she never wanted, but they never gave themselves. Consequently, Michelle never learned how to give herself and, as a result, her children and husband are suffering.

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Some husbands are like this, too. Susan came for counseling because she was feeling empty and unfulfilled. She said to me, \"My husband is a good man. He has a good job. He has given me freedom to develop and use my abilities. He has given me a car and everything a woman could want except what she needs most of all. He has no idea how to give himself.\"

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Some of the early Christians were written about in the Bible because of their generosity. I’m sure the reason their story was included in the greatest of all books was because \"they first gave themselves.\"¹ Their monetary gifts were a natural expression of their having first given themselves. This is the secret for all true giving.

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But how do we give ourselves?

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Primarily by being open and transparent and sharing our true feelings.

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The closed person who is insecure and defensive hides behind his mask. He isn’t free to open himself, and therefore cannot give himself. He is afraid that if he does open himself and becomes known for who he really is he won’t be liked or loved, so he stays closed.

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People can only give themselves when they are able to remove their masks and share their innermost feelings, their faults, temptations, sins, weaknesses, failures, strengths, joys, and dreams.

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This doesn’t mean that we should share all of these things with everyone. Not at all. However, to be able to give ourselves we need to be able to open our inner selves to at least the ones we love.

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This means we express our deepest feelings to them. We also give them our understanding, acceptance, and unconditional love. Our gifts and favors to them don\'t have any strings attached. We give them time. We give them our full attention. We learn how to listen to them and hear what they are saying even beyond their words. We are sensitive to and are accepting of their feelings. When we are with then, we are with them. We do not withdraw and always give them our presence.

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The giving of ourselves is the
most valuable gift of all.

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Giving gifts without giving ourselves is a kind of tradeoff. It may not even be giving at all. It may be little more than manipulation. The popular songwriter made a profound statement when he wrote, \"All I have to offer you is me,\" because that is one of the greatest gifts of love there is.

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To love is to give yourself. That’s the whole point of Christmas. God loved us so much that, to save us from our self-destructive sins, he gave himself by giving his own Son, Jesus Christ, who in turn gave himself for us. He gave his life on the cross to purchase forgiveness and the gift of eternal life for us.

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To receive God’s gift of forgiveness and eternal life, all we need to do is admit our sinfulness, thank Christ for dying on the cross in our place, and respond to his invitation to receive him unto our heart as Lord and Savior.

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And so, in our giving this Christmas may we first thank God for his gift of love to us, and give of ourselves to our loved ones before giving them material gifts.

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God’s gift of divine love and the gift of yourself are of more value than all the paintings or treasures in the world. They’re free. They’re already yours. Have you discovered them? For a prayer to help you accept God\'s free gift click on the \"God\'s Invitation\" button link below. (Note: If you are on any site other than that of the main website of ACTS International, click on the \"God\'s Invitation\" button or link at the bottom of the page.)

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1. 2 Corinthians 8:5.

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